How many of you are old enough to remember Janet Jackson’s chart-topping album “Control”? In 1986, as a thirteen year old, I remember jamming to the title track, as well as hits like “Nasty”, “What Have You Done For Me Lately?”, and “Let’s Wait A While”. Control and Rhythm Nation, in my opinion, set Miss Jackson apart as a musical artist. And don’t even get me started on her choreography.
But the word control is on my mind for reasons far deeper than this monumental album. As I type today, I ponder on how destructive control has been to me as an individual, and to our world as a whole. Control may be the one catalyst that breeds more chaos and dysfunction than any other type of energy in existence.
Now, don’t confuse the control I AM referring to with the scientific principle of control. When we use the word control in the scientific sense, we are referring to the one component of an experiment that is static; unchanged. Every other component is a variable, meaning they are interchangeable.
That control is a noun. It is a person, place, or thing that remains consistent throughout the course of research and investigation. The control I AM speaking of is the verb. I present to you control, as an effort to make decisions and decide what will happen to something or someone. This control requires a great deal of energy exertion, while remaining unable to actually determine the outcome of any scenario.
The most human thing we do as sentient beings is attempt to control that which we are not in control of, while allowing that which we are actually responsible for to be controlled and affected by external stimuli. Though the two controls I have presented are different (one is a noun; the other a verb), the two are actually interrelated. In this experiment called life, I AM the control, and everything else is a variable. As I AM the only control in my life, I AM only accountable for controlling myself. However, I must first distinguish my true self from my visage. My true self is my soul, and my soul expresses itself by energy alone.
My visage is my outer appearance and shell. In itself, my visage is a responder, and therefore is unable to be controlled. Though I can take action to influence my bodily response, I AM still unable to guarantee that response. It is possible to eat “healthy” and exercise regularly, and the body still not respond in the way I hoped. It is also possible to eat like crap and never exercise, and yet that body sustain a long, healthy life. This is because those things are out of our control. There are so many other external factors that go into how the body responds.
My emotions, on the contrary, are completely under my control. I alone can decide what will happen with them. They are connected exclusively to my soul, and as such, I can decide to remain in control of my emotions despite what others say or do. I AM powerless to control what another being does, yet I AM in complete control of how I allow what other beings do affect the way I feel. No one can make me feel any type of way.
Slavery is a system of control where an individual or institution attempts to determine the outcome of a situation involving another being. Control is unnatural, and it causes one to judge another in unrighteousness. For example, the average parent attempts to control his or her child/children. The parent believes it is his or her responsibility to form the child into what they perceive the child should be. Sadly, parents rarely take the time to observe their children in the aim of simply understanding the divine beings in their care. So, in their quest to decide what will happen to the children they have been charged to care for, they frustrate the children and themselves because they have sought to control that which they have no control over. They have attempted to break the souls (the actual control) of those children, believing themselves to be the god of the child. The god of the child, though, is exclusively within the child. It is the child’s own soul.
In this world, our neglect of responsibility for our own soul has led us to attempt to decide who is right or wrong based upon how they have “made us feel”. When others don’t fall in line with our attempt to control them, we decide that they are responsible for the chaos that ensues. The truth is that we alone are responsible for the chaos because we have given variables the authority to affect us against our will. We have forsaken our real control trying to control others, and thus, the true creative energy within us is allowed to be out of control.
Love has no desire to control. Love is liberating. Love is full of acceptance, but because we have been so conditioned to try to control the parts of our world that are beyond our control, we have lost ourselves. We have become conformed to a standard that leaves us perpetually in a state of despair, because we are attempting to create from a place of lack; lack of control. What we need to do is learn to set our intentions, while simultaneously releasing our need to control the outcome. It’s from this heart-space that we actually become accountable co-creators of our reality, and we stop being victims of circumstances. Here is where we stop attempting to punish people for being who they are, and begin accepting them as they are. Here is where we begin to open up our bowels of compassion, and take our position in the healing of the world.