I know we want to not need others, but that is not from the divine space of the soul. The ego, from the place of brokenness, experienced in needing people who were not bringing us to our divine realities, takes us into arrogance instead of self-love.
The ego is chaotic by nature because everything is dualistic for it. The soul, however, is intent on oneness; harmony, and recognizes that the ego needs correction, and it often does not respond well to the soul’s correction, until it hears the same message from another source.
The ego is a separatist. It wants to be an island while relying still on resources from others. There is no one who is able to survive completely alone. The ego will have you believing you can be either independent or dependent, when the reality of existence is interdependence.
Reciprocity is the primary operation of The Universe. Everything functions according to the principle of sowing and reaping. Whatever you put out is what you’re going to get back, and the ego disregards this law. The reality is that humans often refuse to allow love because people from their past hurt them under the guise of love.
While love, perfect love, has no expectations, we still have a divine responsibility to both transmit and receive it- in the way that lends to Tikkun Olam, the restoration of all. The ego rejects accountability for anyone or anything else than itself. The ego doesn’t even give a fuck about the soul, and thus cannot actually perceive love.
The ego is consumed with self-preservation. It only cares about its own survival, even if that means it destroys everyone and everything else around it. Anything that the ego perceived as a threat to its separatism is left in the wake of its destruction.
The soul, at some point, is going to get the ego’s attention, and show it just how counterproductive its selfishness is, and how it is not at all the self-love it tries to portray it as. Someone who connects to the soul is going to come along and be long-suffering in love, and this is when the decision has to be made by the ego to understand what the soul has been saying all along, or continue on the path that will cause it to eventually die alone.
There are just some things that the ego is incapable of achieving except it finally delights itself in the soul, and this is when the soul actually gives the ego the TRUE desires of the heart. The heart desires companionship. The heart desires cooperation. The heart desires that the two become one again, and as whole as each of us may be in ourselves, the whole objective of this incarnation is to experience our divinity in another being, and that other being has a longing to love you even as he or she loves him or herself.